Saturday, June 7, 2008

WELL HELLS BELLS!!

Well DAMN GUYS!! That didnt work either!! all those deep calmin breathes for nothin!!

WHY does the Googlemeister hate me? why is he blockin my post? Does he have nothin better to do? Is it cause i am cuter than him? or cause I dont have to create a 50 gagillion dollar business to get friends????

Shouldnt he be off creatin more googly typeish things for our enjoyment.....

Honestly i loves the Gmeister and all his lil toys but if he doesnt stop lurkin around my forest ... cuttin my posts to shreds...well its gonna be ON boyo!!

OMG OMG its past noon and the genius vibes are finally flowin! *yea yea it takes a while....SHUT UP!* :P

I just had a genius thought....ok nobody leave the circle of peaceful meanderings..... i'll BRB!

da da da da da da daaaaaaaaa dum dum dum dum DUM dadadadada........... *thats jeopardy theme folks...hum along as we wait .....*

WOOT WOOT and triple WOOT!! IT WORKED!! MWWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I AM A GENIUS SHEEEERR GENIUS!! *ala Wile E Coyote* or howevers ya spells it!

ok iffen ya go read the Danger blog....... scroll down and read MY comment FIRST hehe! It let me post the beginning of the blog in the comments section!

HA AND HA Gmeister! outwitted again! *blowin raspberries cause i am sooo mature when i win*

LOL
Later Gaters!!!

WHAT IN THE HECKS!?!?!

Well! I just knocked everything off my couch in TOTAL frustration!! Which in hindsight is kinda dumb since I have to clean it all up now!! DAMN DAMN DAMN!!! *ala Florida Evans...Good Times*

That was my 5th time tryin to get that previous post to post correctly!! you see? the one down there? well look DOWN sillies! ok yea THAT one the Danger Blog one......hmmm

Theres a name for a superhero huh? lol DANGERBLOG!! Righting the wrongs in all of blogdom!! Keeping the pen mightier than the sword!! Slicing through ISP mumbo jumbo with his Rapier WIT!! (well of COURSE he has rapier wit...I made him up didnt I!?)

Who the hell is hidin back there Yellin DIGRESS DIGRESS!!? Show yerself chicken! ok ok I KNOW I DIGRESS (but we need a Herooooooooo ....... ok ok i'll stop)

you will note that i didnt even put a SONG at my opening I am SOOOO depressed ..... WHY does this thing NOT wanna load correctly? I am leavin it just as it is too

I am gonna try to put the beginning of it (The part thats missin anways) at the end of this blog and see if it will take... CROSS FINGERS!!!

Umm you...over there...yea you with the weird assed shirt on...If you are NOT gonna cross your fingers like the rest of us ...then you may NOT sit in my lil forest of freindship... SO GET OFFA MY TOADSTOOL JERK!!

*deep calming breaths.... ooooooommmmm oooooooommmmmm* ok now as I was sayin... wishes me lucks peeps....

Baby, would you min

DANGER!!! If you are under the age of 18 GO AWAY! You have been Warned!!



Ok guys! I feel at this point I must redeem my self for the debacle of '08!! yea the i got the name wrong thing! So I am BACK! and I have just what you have been waiting for.....

Its ok folks, you can safely return to my Blogdom.
...everything is fine...come on, gather round...no pushing sally be nice! I see you over there Spirit! stop hidin behind the tree and get out here! you will enjoy this one.

OK here we go! THE ORIGIN OF SLANG WORDS!!! SIKE hehe just kidding! BUT I havea new word for ya and I am gonna tell ya how it came about. my sis and I were yackin away on msn and being the fast typist that I am...i often screw words up so the convo went a lil somethin like this.....

Lisa says:

HE SHOOTS HE SCORES!!!!!!! REDWINGS DRAW FIRST BLOOD!! WOOT!


UMMM uhh...WAIT that aint right! (that was a good score tho i must say) HOLD on........ *rummages around in MS Word* I swear i had it RIGHT HERE!!! AHHH here we go....

La says:

lol....the empathy rolls off you in waves

Lisa says:

it does! it does! i am watchin it roll away as we apek even

La says:

as we apek?

Lisa says:

speak even

La says:

did you apek?

La says:

I have trouble with that

Lisa says:

shhh dont ask dont tell

La says:

havent had a good apek in years

La says:

oooooo......sorry

La says:

tmi

Lisa says:

well thats just sad for you

La says:

lmao

La says:

isnt it though


*Ok at this point we were talkin bout stuff i refuse to discuss with you nosybodies! and now back to apeking!


La says:

LMAO

La says:

dang we has coined a new word

La says:

"apek"

Lisa says:

lol i know aint it grand

La says:

yeah it is

La says:

we are on the cutting edge her

La says:

and here

Lisa says:

i better start a notebook or i will forget all this genius by morning


So thats how it came about peeps and now (for the women anyways...) I shall use it in a sentence in case you havent quite got the meaning yet.


" Yea so my so-called BF pissed me off cause he was iggin me! so i tolds him...i says .... You knows what? I gots a date with my shower massager and I plan to APEK OFTEN................. WITHOUT YOU!! "


got it ladies?! oh and gents? well gents I really HOPE you got it more...I mean do you really want your girl apekin without ya? I WOULD HOPE NOT! and while we are on the subject...

lemme just toss ya one of my fav quotes..........





AND as to the song at the beginning of this...for those of you in the unawares... Its one of my FAV Janet Jackson songs....... called would you mind....the link to the video is below...... All I can say is I wish I had thought of her methods when all the apekin was goin on!!!

Later gaters!!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l8sDFS_mwfc Great song and the guy in this is hilarious!! I think he apeked a few times...but ya cant tell sigh!!!

MYRTLE THE MAD!!!

IN the Jungle...the mighty jungle...the lion sleeps tonite....... In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lions sleeps toniiiiiiiiiiiitttttttttteeeee......... a wimba way a wimba way, blah blah, etc you get the drift!!

HELLLLLOOOOO my fellow Bloggers! and NON Bloggers also!!! time to meet other members of my blogdom!!

Myrtle Be her name, and turtlin be her game....... Myrtle the Turtle (YES!Thats her REAL name!! dont knock it! its CUTE! It was given to her by my son who was about 7 or so at the time!) is a true family member here...

no the bitch wont do dishes, but i forgive her that seein as shes got such tiny hands.....yea i said hands...

I asked her if she was willin to do laundry and she asked me if I smoked crack! Well! i guess that settled that question...

The funny thing about Myrtle is that for the longest time i never knew turtles made any noise at all..... then one nite I was watchin some horror flick (so i am thinkin she did it on purpose!) and off to the side of me came this weird assed noise!

I am tryin to figure out how to describe it... she is a Muck turtle if that helps lol it a weird lil schreechy noise that she makes and when there is dead silence in the house it can really screw with you brains!! Those of you that have noisy turtles can relate!

Now here is another thing about turtles...whoever gave them that slow movin title was a dope! if you put myrtle on the floor and leave her alone to get used to her surroundings...chicky takes off like a Nascar racer determined to finish first! ALL turtles are NOT slow folks!!

WHY WHY WHY am i talkin to you about a turtle? well cause shes one of my bestest friends (which is pretty sad when you think about it) and i happen to think she is awesome!!

Later Gaters!!

HOT! HOT! HOT!

Hot town, Summer In the city....back of my neck feelin dirty and grity..........

ok dont ask cause i dont rem....i prob could find out for you who sings that but why bother?

I AM HOT!! and NOT in the good way!! YES YES I AM a hot chick...dont get me wrong.... but thats NOT whats on the agenda today...

WHY WHY WHY?????? Why do peoples in Florida DARE to rent places with NO air!?

THIS is WRONG folks! wrong in every way that can be wrong!!! I am thinkin RIOT here!! COME ON my fellow floridians RISE UP!! DAMN THE MAN

*pssttt whos the MAN!? ...i dunno just follow along with her....its easier that way!*

ok i soooo dont wanna hear from you happy shiney air conditioned folks......do you even KNOW what it feels like to peel your body off of a leather couch in the summer????

"oh yea, get this cute leather couch...nvm that you will be DYING come summer...dumbass!!

WHAT WAS I THINKING!! WHY DID I MOVE HERE!!???

My sister says that i must think positively about whatever situation i am in.

Well i am melting into a PUDDLE of Posititivity right about now...... there are many puddles here so watch where you step folks.... this may be the last time you are invited into my lil blogdom world!!!

If i arent careful...the landlord will come around and mop me away....sigh

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

WOOH WEEEE! I Am an Idjit and I stand corrected

They're Pinky and the brain, pinky and the brain...one is a genius ..the other insane.....

OK OK OK!! I never said I ws the smartest kid off the block! For those of you who read the last post (and those who didnt but will NOW that i have said it :P ) here is my one and only (prob) TRUE apology!

I stand CORRECTED! the name is WRONG!! our imaginary friends name was NOT Zeena! OMG how could I have made such a HUGE mistake? I am not worthy! i am not worthy! beat me! flog me! strip me down and roll me in the rushes with the ticks, chiggers, and other offensive insects!

IT is NO MORE than what I deserve! NARF! YES YES I am the insane one and my sis is the genius...sigh. for the longest time i thought it was the other ways around, but this just proves the point!

she has texted me and said HEY! IDJIT! HER NAME WAS KULAHGA YA BIG DOPE!!

ok so peeps you can now see where i am comin from tho right? I mean wtf kinda name is Kulahga!?! I gotta look at my keyboard when i type it to make sure i got it right GEEZ!

that comment i made before about us not being crazy or possessed? well maybe we weren't either of those but with us makin up a name like Kulahga i am thinkin just MAYBE we were a bit on the retarded side! (DO NOT SEND ME COMMENTS ON HOW I AM NOT BEING PC!)

I will flog you if you try it! I am NOT PC! i TRY and i TRY! but sometimes its a bother and who the HELL came up with that anyways!?!

ok i know, digressing.

but take me as i am or get the hell offa my page! *oh my! where did that come from!*

ok back to the K chick!! yea i refuse to keep spellin that out! BLEH!

I am thinkin that over the yrs my brain went into overdrive as it so often does and i decided that Zeena was a much better and safer (read PC :P) name for her. seriously... Kulahga sounds like some chick from the caveman ages...and OUR Kulahga would not have taken that caveman crap at all!

Good ole SIS (I luvs you BIATCH! THANKS SO MUCH!) also reminded me that YES! OMG YES! OUR MOM DID KNOW!! that woman went to work and told her friends about how CUTE her kids were to have and imaginary friend!

OH! Needless to say the next time we went with her to work (which before i must say was always a fun and joyous occasion!) well, her co-workers made it a point to ask us about how our little friend was doing! I HATE GROWNUPS!! Oh crap wait...i am one now...so they tell me!

can we say embarrassed beyond all belief? YES WE CAN!

soooo iffen the k chick were still around the convo would go a lil sumpin like this.

What are we going to do today brain? The same as every night Pinky plan to take over the world! NARF!!!

did i apologize for gettin the name wrong? OK good cause that what i started this for lmao!

Later gaters!!

ZEENA! (NO Not the Warrior Princess! I DO know how to spell a little bits!)

People let me tell you bout my beeeesst frienddddd! (courtship of Eddies Father theme song, circa 1970 somethin or other!)


OK so i was thinkin...... yes, thats a dangerous hobby, i do it anyways cause i am BRAVE!!

Anyhows, i was thinkin back on when my sister and I were kids ( In case he is reading this, YES, we had a baby brother too but he wasn't born til i was 10 and these thoughts are pre-brother times)

some where between the ages of six and nine or so, we had an imaginary friend named Zeena. now i have been on the sites and i now know that we were not crazy or possessed (thank you Docs!) Kids have imaginary friends. some have more than one.

Hey! who else are you gonna blame crap on? Well sure she could blame stuff on me and I could deny it but inevitably i would have to man up and take it.

Yea I could blame stuff on her, NOT! I would get my ass kicked! Why? cause i was the youngest and smallest. not that my sister was that much bigger than me but girlfriend had muscles in her legs that could shoot me across the room when we were wrestling on the bed! (oh come on! you know that game you played as kids to see who could push the other off the bed first? No? never played it? BOY did you guys miss out!!)

BTW I think she got those muscles from chasing me around and chasin after kids that I had antagonized with my rapier wit to the point where they wanted to do me bodily harm! So yer welcome for the muscles La! truly it was MY pleasure :P

I digress yet again, sorry. (btw digress is my polite word for "oh shit I'm a ramblin again!")

So Zeena, this chick did everything with us pretty much, camp outs in our room with the sheets stapled or taped up to make tents (Mom wasn't to happy bout the staples, lemme tell ya! HAHAHA)

She started fights between us, how i have NO idea! I mean she was IMAGINARY for cryin out loud!

When i went on our class trip to the Zoo i made her stand beside the White Lions cage so i could take her picture and never forget her face. hmmmm, the pic got messed up! I see the lions but that damned Zenna must have dashed away just before i snapped it! Blast the girl!! Come to think of it i BEAT my sis told her to do it cause i got to spend the whole day with Zeena and she DIDN'T! Bad La, Bad!

Now my biggest curiosity in this WHOLE imaginary friend thing is how my sis and i came up with the same friend. i mean you don't sit down and discuss makin up a friend cause, well, then its NOT and imaginary friend and shes not real shes just...... well.... made up! not the same at all

Whoever you naysayers are that are gonna try and contradict me, DON'T BOTHER! Many have tried, NONE have won! i reign supreme here in my blogdom. so BACK OFF!

its like one day we were just sittin there and one of us prob said sumpin like "hey save some of those cookies for Zeena!" and the other said "ok ok!" or more likely "screw her let her find her own damn cookies, these are MINE!" (I did say I had a rapier wit as a child did i not?)

This also reminds me of that movie Drop Dead Fred with Phoebe Cates as a grownup whose imaginary friend comes back to life. her mom took her to a psych type doc to get rid of him! Thank the Goddess that didn't happen with us! I would hate to think of poor Zenna shriveling up into nothingness. *tear...sob... sniffle*

and on that thought, I also cant remember if we ever mentioned her to our mom or if she was our lil secret. ask my sis maybe her memory is better than mines........better yet, DONT ask her! she will prob tell horror stories of some imaginary thing that she claims I did when it was prob her and Zenna! I dont get no respect i tell ya!

So that there is Zeenas story. I thought it would be nice if she lived on in blogdom since she is long gone from what you peeps call the real world.

You are missed chicka!

BTW, I found out that there is a place called Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends! its on the cartoon network website and it is for those imaginary friends of ours when we abandon them and they have no place to go. So, i would like to think that Zeena is there somewhere (even tho cartoon network wasn't even a thought when i was a kid!) runnin around with the others gettin them in trouble and occasionally have a good thought of the times we 3 had together.................

Thats what I would LIKE to think, but if I know Zeena... and i do...she is playin and crap sure, but when her thoughts turn to us she is prob thinkin " bratty lil kids leavin me to wander the netherworld for ages til this place came along!" AH ZEENA!! Ya gotta love her (i got a lotta my wit from her btw!)

Later gaters!

What? Me? Paranoid?

Why do you always follow meee? follow me? foooollloooww mmeeeeeeeeee? why do you always follow meeee? FA FA LOW LOW MEEEE!?

Ok where does this stem from you wanna know? Good cause I was gonna tell ya anyways hehe

I went to the ATM one evening. I wont say when or what area of town i was in tho! WHY? Ummm read above plz! Paranoia set in BIG time!

I swear lol i was lookin at lil ole ladies that prob couldn't move any faster than my turtle (Tho that chick can get some speed on her if you put her on a rug instead of linoleum!) wondering what ulterior motives they might have in mind........

I SEE YOU OVER THERE GRANNY!! I will kick yer butt if you come any closer!! hmmmm did I MENTION i was paranoid?

Then there are those folks on the bikes.... folks in Orlando ride bikes obsessively i swear! So this guy comes rollin up as I am headin for the bank....... (yes the bank is CLOSED! its after 10 PM for gods sake peeps!) Anyways, my good friend Para (thats Paranoia folks! try to keep up mmmkay?) well, Para says ...pssst... chicky! look at that guy over there! DO NOT head for the bank now!!

So what did I do? well hell I aint stupids! I went in the store next door and wandered around like i HAD money LOL. waitin for para to tell me it was safe to go to the bank.

The moral being folks...lets all try to rem to hit the ATM BEFORE nitefall OK!? OK!

BTW that first part? about follow me? I dont know how many of you remember it but its a kids song.... i couldnt give ya the tune if you pulled my toenails out one by one tho SRY! but it pops into my head on occasion and this time led me to this rant.

Now being the good lil researcher that I am, And always wanting you to get your moneys worth from my blog (What the HELL do you MEAN you dont pay to be here? GEEZ!) I did go lookin for who or what wrote this lil ditty but i found nothing. as i am writing tho I THINK maybe it was a girl scout or campfire girls song. Well whateva, if you know the source feel free to let me know as I am one of those obsessive peeps that wants to know ALL!!

Later gaters!